Pisces Descendant (of Virgo Ascendants)


This is from my own perspective, being a Virgo rising. Before, I wasn’t really conscious of how Virgo manifests in my personality, and how I struggle in opposition with Pisces-dominant people. For about a year I have believed that I had Leo rising, but when I double-checked and confirmed that Virgo was indeed my ascendant, everything made sense. I stand out most of the time but not because of having Leo energy. Perhaps it was because of the dominant Scorpionic energy in me (Venus in Scorpio, and Mars and Pluto conjunct in Scorpio) and Chiron in my ascendant. Chiron makes me different and somehow bullied (during my childhood) for who I am and for what I look like. Chiron in my first house makes me uncategorizable, misunderstood, and alien. It made me mold a mask for myself unconsciously, just to fit in. But ironically, that mask is being the center of attention, star of the show, and everything that the behind-the-scenes Virgo is afraid to be. I am either the outcast or the dominant figure – but most of the time I feel like an outcast because being the “star” is only my mask to somehow be respected (and not be bullied again). It is not who I am deep inside.

Anyway, back to Pisces descendant – the first manifestation of this in my life is that I am always in conflict with my younger sister who is a Pisces sun. Libra is my sun sign; and we could have lived together more harmoniously if Virgo was not my ascendant sign. Virgo is my obvious personality, and it is in opposition with her Pisces sun. We had always disagreed with each other for the smallest things. We disliked each other growing up, but it must have been hard for her because one Virgoan trait that I display in my family is being critical and saying my opinions even though most of the time they don’t wanna hear them, but her Piscean sense of escapism and dislike for conflict are just letting me chatter alone. She is always off to her own dreamland, so I couldn’t reach her. I couldn’t have the only playmate that I had in my childhood. She is so content in her fantasyland, but my Cancer moon felt so left out and neglected. Nobody could understand my emotional needs in my family. I think they were all escapists and disliking conflict so much that they keep on suppressing my Mars in Scorpio that just wanted to burst every time they ignore my constant need for love and affection. Having my Mars in conjunct with my Pluto, the result of that is almost having an unpredictable nuclear bombing in our home. And they hated me for that. They don’t want to face the chaos that they are creating. And I also couldn’t help my uncontrollable emotions, having a Grand Water Trine in my natal chart, in which Scorpio is obviously the most dominant.

The second manifestation of having a Pisces descendant in my life is having boyfriends or lovers or suitors that are irresponsible and are seriously in need of my help but are not willing to accept it or are not willing to change and they’d rather escape instead through daydreaming, being lazy, or through alcohol and marijuana. I am not really attracted to the Piscean quality in men; I actually like those who emit a powerful sexuality, having my Venus and Mars in Scorpio. However, the boyfriends that I’ve had are very kind at first, they hide their true selves appearing at first to be the positive qualities of Pisces but later on their true colors come up and I eventually see something chaotic, irresponsible, stubborn, self-pitying, and kind of stupid (I’m sorry) or lacking common sense. Being a Virgo rising, I would unconsciously attempt to fix them or try to change their negative qualities and turn them into achievers and responsible beings. At first they’d try to, to avoid making me angry, but in the long run, it was all a pretense. I always give up because they are more comfortable in being losers and doing nothing in life. Virgos just want to do something, do something, do something, or else they’d feel terrible for being unproductive. And to my frustration, I just attract men who need saving, acting like damsels in distress, but would resent me for trying to help them get out of their comfort zone.

Ethan Hawke  as Troy Dyer in Reality Bites (1994)

Those were my ex-boyfriends. But still, my Pisces descendant continues to manifest because I have one persistent admirer right now that still hopes that one day we will end up being together. But I do not like him and I reject him all the time! And I am just in awe of his thick face for hoping that I will fall in love with him when he still has existential crisis (he is eleven years older than me), still cannot finish his studies, does not go to school every day, and does not follow my advice. It's because I do my best in constantly improving myself while he cannot even show me a small hint of maturity that would make him husband-material. Perhaps one of the things that make Virgo and Pisces go in opposition with each other is the fact that Pisceans are idealists and perhaps devoured by their own delusions sometimes while Virgos are (kind of) harsh realists that want Pisces to actually “do something” tangible to make their imaginations come true. However, Pisceans dislike the way Virgos are disrupting their journeys on their non-existent utopias – but they cannot prevent Virgos for doing that, because Virgo always want to help! And Virgos get hurt when people do not appreciate their help, do not heed their advices, or resent them for their good intentions. And another thing that worries me is that I have Saturn in Pisces, manifested in a way that my father is an absolute escapist, always resorting to alcohol and cigarettes and is afraid to be a responsible father to me and my sister. I worry that one day I would have a husband that also has his negative tendencies, because too much idealism and laziness irk me. I just want to escape from my Pisces descendant, because I keep on attracting people who seriously need help but do not want any help from me.

I know that Pisceans out there also want to give me a piece of their mind, and say how unfair this post is, but this is coming from the perspective of someone having a Virgo ascendant. I know that we cannot stand each other sometimes; but as we mature, and resist each other’s annoying traits decreasingly, I’m sure that this relationship of astrological opposition will eventually make us grow. But right now, I am mostly concerned about my romantic affairs – surely, as a book-loving college student, I do not want another Piscean delinquent who won’t listen to my advice!

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