Relatives


At this point in my life I am suddenly surrounded by relatives – most of them were lastly seen for more than a decade. While I was growing up as a schoolgirl and a preteen, almost none of them came looking for me or my family. Pretty much all of us were too busy living our lives without each other then; probably because in my childhood we had too much company of each other. The ages 9 – 15 for me was very crucial for a child, because during that period it undergoes too many changes physically and psychologically, and I also think that during that time a child really needs the support and the tender loving care from its family and relatives. But for me however, my own family were my enemies and I felt like a black sheep, and the imagined distance of my once-close relatives added to my sufferings and core belief that I was alone in the world. Most of you probably already know that I was a geeky, unattractive child who suffered from inferiority complex. I did not really realize how far I have gone vibrationally until my relatives from all over the province gushed about how different I have grown from the plain child that I was.

Lately, the relatives and older cousins that took care of me and my sister in our childhood love coming to our house and ask how we are doing. The moment that they see me, they really gush at how I pretty I am now. (Am that I ugly back then?) They were in awe at how much I’ve grown, how Thea is still Thea but just a wee bit more charming. They’d talk to me, hug me, get my attention, compliment me, until all the attention was mine and my sister was completely ignored. Yes, this kind of phenomenon happens in my life now, when in my childhood my sister was the one who gets attention and love because she was cute and I was always left in the corner, lonely and sullen, feeling unattractive all the time (as a girl, my self-worth is pretty much attached to my loveliness). It’s like every single time, they notice nothing about me except for my beauty and physical features. They treat me like how I wanted to be treated all my life, which is like a princess that came out of a fairytale book (pardon my exaggerations). I spent most of my childhood acing my classes and learning shit for the sole purpose of being on the top of the class, but beauty occupied my mind the instant I became a teen. As a result I flunked some of my subjects, but nonetheless I think I’ve attained that prettiness that I have been wishing for all my life. And I thank my relatives for confirming that, since believe it or not, I haven’t still gotten rid of my inferiority complex 100%. I also thank the law of attraction for letting human beings attain what they focus hardly on.

But really, our house right now is surrounded by houses of relatives. When I was a child, we were like living all by ourselves in the wilderness but this sudden coming of our relatives in our lives and surroundings is a warm blessing from the universe, since we can always count on them in times of need. Other people can treat us like trash simply because they don’t know us but our relatives rarely do that. Sometimes I get irritated when my relatives suddenly visit our house because I am a very private person who needs a lot of time for myself but later on I realized that they may be just pulling me out of my loneliness. Sometimes I even get a bit emotional in their presence because I am reminded of the warm memories that we shared in my childhood. I can only remember warmth and laughter from them most of the time. I’ve only come to the realization just now how important family is; after all, they are a reminder that everything in existence is interconnected and not separate to each other, regardless of the physical separation that we experience in this three-dimensional world. 

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