Sisterly Love

My sister and I had thousands of fights since I was a toddler and she was a baby. While I was eating sweets that my mother gave me, I was annoyed by her loud cries so I kicked her. How ruthless I was! I thought it would stop her from making noises, but it didn't. It was the start of our sibling rivalry.

I have always envied her when we were little girls. Mommy always carried her while I always had to walk. Our relatives adored her more than me, maybe because she's cuter. And perhaps that is why I am so touchy about it until now. She never fails to annoy the crap out of me. I remember hitting her head, punching her, biting her arms and back. I was a good girl at school, but not at home, because of her. Several times I wished that I was the only child, or the younger child, or that she wasn't born because she gets all the attention. But there is one advantage of being the older sister - she gets my old stuff while they buy me new ones!

As schoolchildren, our relationship with each other never changed, even though we fought less. It annoyed me whenever she asked for help for her school works. Ugh. We weren't close, she had her own life and I had my own life too. I thought that it was better that way because you could only expect war when we are together.

Now that we are both teenagers, and she's taller than me now, I don't feel like I'm the older sister. I never acted like one anyway, I'm just the more aggressive one. Some people mistake her as the older one, but I'm never offended by that. It actually is a compliment that I look younger than my age, haha. But honestly, I feel like we' are already growing apart. I realized that I didn't like it that way. I missed her. We're actually kind of close back when we were preschoolers.

I don't have any other sibling. I only have her. That is why when we were little girls, she was my only playmate. I played, danced, and sang with her. I was always the leader, and she just followed. We had really happy times together back when our imaginations run really wild. Those moments where told to me by the old photo album that we have.

We still fight until now, but it rarely happens. Now I love her as a best friend, although I have two other best friends, and I'll cherish every moment I have with her. Ate loves you, Camille. :) I am not actually sure if you will ever see this blog post.

If you don't understand how a woman could both love her sister dearly and want to wring her neck at the same time, then you were probably an only child. 
- Linda Sunshine 

Having a sister is like having a best friend you can't get rid of. You know whatever you do, they'll still be there.- Amy Li

Sisterly love is, of all sentiments, the most abstract. Nature does not grant it any functions. - Ugo Betti

It's hard to be responsible, adult and sensible all the time. How good it is to have a sister whose heart is as young as your own. - Pam Brown

My Admirer

Before I thought he liked me too
And it's because of a friend that's why I knew
Too much happiness it made me feel
Overjoyed that I can be ill.

And whenever he is there I blush
My heartbeats suddenly begin to rush
At first I did nothing but deny
Just to hide my feelings I did lie.

My love goes deeper as time goes by
As I get to know this pretty guy
To him I can't take off my eye
I was really in love with him, oh my!

Nothing remains a secret as they say
So my secret just spread in the class one day
He felt awkward as I can see
But it's not a reason to avoid me.

He really ignores me, I wonder why
Maybe it's just that he's being shy
And he just can't find any words to say
But we are not close, so I guess it's okay.

One day I was warned by a very close friend
He said that my feelings for him now should end
The rumor that he likes me is a very big lie
That's why he can't even say a simple hi.

So I told my classmates to please stop the tease
Then I asked who his true crush is
Through a text message a close friend did send
As I read I was shocked, it was my dear best friend!

After a long time my heart is broken again
Because of what I've just found out then
I just hope this won't ruin our friendship
Though my heart was shattered and wounded very deep.

Meanest Guy

I kept wondering what mistakes I made
Why did your feelings suddenly fade
I thought all the love left can still be revived
But no, it didn't, how can I survive

You don't care if I say I'm sorry
What benefits do you get with your pride?
Is it easy for you to trash our love story
Is is stupid to believe that I'll be your bride?

Just days after I set you free
You immediately found someone who'd replace me
Don't you have any respect left in you?
Though I'm so jealous there's nothing I can do

Someday you'd surely realize
How much of a jerk you've been
One day tears will flood from your eyes
'Cause you're the meanest guy I've ever seen.


'Til now I don't understand what I feel 
'Cause I'm still stunned the moment you stare 
If it's just infatuation and not for real
Throughout these times why do I still care?

It's not new to me that you avoid still
For you knew how much you have sinned
It took a long time for my wounds to heal
But my feelings just can't be blown away by the wind

When you look why do I still feel weak,
When you talk why do I get blushes on cheeks?
And whenever you smile, I can't help but smile too
Though there's someone in my heart, there's still room for you

I don't want to get my old feelings back
I promise I won't 'til chickens learn to quack
But it seems you have made me love you again
Now I guess I'm again ready to be heartbroken

My ex-crush, can't you just leave me alone?
You'd only hurt me deeply to my bones
Please don't make me feel like you like me too
A smile means a lot, be careful of what you do. 


You're telling me that you love me
But I don't know if I'd believe
You love two girls and that shouldn't be
But you won't really let me leave

How come that you still can't let go
She's now a part of history
It hurts 'cause I do love you so
Forget her for she set you free

Now tell me what's this all about
I'm starting to have many doubts
Could it be that you're just using me
To bring back what you lost to thee?

Now that she wants you back for good
You're asking me now what you should
Go for her if she makes you glad
'Cause loving two girls at once is bad.

All this time I had been true
And I meant those three words I love you
I never wanted to be the second "hon"
So now you should only choose one.

No One Said

No one asked me to try this relationship
No one said I should love you way too deep
I thought I shouldn't mind what others say
But I realized they're right when you pushed me away.

Yes I know I'm more than stupid
But has someone said you are worse than a bastard?
I'm feeling great pain, thanks to Cupid
Why are you making things so hard?

No one said I that I should believe you
No one said I should meet someone new
If only I knew that to me this would happen
I would have broke your heart first then.

I'm trying so hard so you'd get off my mind
There's nothing to hate, with your love I am blind
I mean it when I said I'll love you forever
I still love you but now I want you never.

Dear Crush

I know you know that I like you
And I'm hoping that you're like that too.
But because I can't control your feelings
If you like my best friend  I can do nothing.
You're my first thought when I wake up
My fancy when I dream or nap.
The reason why I go to school,
A sight of you makes me delightful.
In my wallet I have your pictures
That I always look at even during lectures
When I am bored I scribble your name
And I've been inspired ever since you came.
I look at every act you do
And I can't take my eyes off you
I blush when you stare or talk to me
I'm so crazy for you, can't you see?
I don't care if you don't feel the same
But my heart always screams your name
I've always wanted to get your attention
And I don't care if it's just infatuation
Now that I've already made my confession
About my true feelings and emotion
I want you to know that you are my first love
The most important thing that I could ever have.

I composed this when I was 13, and I was crazy about a classmate.:)
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