Martyr


This lass who possesseth a vulnerable heart
For eternity feareth that her beau wouldst depart
He very well knowest how she was so thin-skinned
But his selfishness only blew her an ill wind. 

He loveth many women, but she was so blind
Kept repeating to herself, "Love is patient, love is kind,"
When he sayeth "I love you," all his sins she disregards
Love's such sweet sorrow, how come it is so hard?

Always grieving, she hath produced a pool of tears
Very well expressed are her misery and fears
His iniquity to her couldst cause her to always faint
But she loveth him so much, for his love she is a saint.

She kept having reveries of their wedding and church bells
But is very aversed to break free of her prison cell
He already thinketh of her as disgusting as tartar
Nonetheless she doth not mind, for his love she is a martyr.

Swain


I indubitably deeply fancy my most dearly loved swain
Although from time to time he bestoweth me pain
When he is afar I behold the glittering stars
I am his and I shall never leave mine heart ajar.

I know that I am loved by my most beloved swain
Acquiring love from other chaps I am sure to abstain
I shall get from only him the most divine flowers
And my heart beset with affection is merely his to devour.

I shall not get forsaken by my most handsome swain
Like the gleeful sun that shineth on my visage fain
And the moon that escorteth me through mine dismal times
Forever I shall keep our reminiscences nohow sour as a lime.

And when the time cometh for my exquisite swain
Wherein the Grim Reaper shall ruthlessly separate us twain
In my allegiance to him I vow to never again marry
Evermore his love in my devoted heart I shall carry.

Fairy Folk

 

Though in their eyes I may seem queer
For having invisible friends so dear
I'm sick of them calling me simpleton
Longing for a prince having my heart won.

I oftentimes get lots of pokes
For believing in foolish fairy folk
They are trying hard to have me awoke
It's true but they exclaim "What a joke!"

They want me to let go of childish dreams
Which only brighten my world so dim
Instead they want me to watch TV news
Of crimes and wars, thus I refuse.

But I want them to know where the real things are
They do not appear in front of the naked eye
Much practicality's a big problem too far
I know it as well as the One up the sky. 

Happy Ending


Real love stories often go like this: The guy whom you presumed to be your Prince Charming suddenly appears in your life, catches your attention, and then woos you. He does all those cheesy and sweet things for you, until you start to think of him every minute. He makes you feel rather special like a princess, furthermore you think that he's the perfect chap for you. After quite some time, you start to feel paranoid and have your insight tell you that you aren't the only girl in his life. Not long after, you broke up. That precious heart of yours which was supposed to be cherished has been smashed. Then, you get bitter.

Maybe that is the reason why they tell me not to get serious in relationships, because romantically serious guys below the age of 25 is very rare. However, you can't really help but fall in love. No matter what, your heart will still be broken. I reckon that my present swain loves me with all his heart because he has introduced me to his family and cried because of me - secretly and in front of me. His mom really likes me, and she even told me that before we got into a relationship, he had many wenches who often came into their house but when I became his girlfriend, no other girl comes there except me.

Like any other girls, I can't help but doubt and get paranoid whether my sweetheart is cheating on me or not. Whatever happens, I must be ready. He isn't 21 yet so there is still some immaturity lurking within his self. Whatever happens, I will still be okay. If the time comes when his love for me fades, I shan't worry for true love is forever. If it'd fade then it ain't true love. False love should be gotten rid of, for it does us no good.

If the time comes when we should let go of each other, I shall not kill myself. It's definitely okay to shed some hot tears for him because he held a special place in my heart, however. Also, I still have my first love, whom I haven't seen and heard of for quite some time. We're like separated lovers from the movies. But I still don't know if he's the one destined for me, though. Waiting for him won't hurt for I know deep in my heart that he has feelings for me too, even though I ain't qualified for beauty contests.

In this time of my life, I am quite uncertain regarding this matter. If ever we broke up, I'd just think that he just filled up a chapter of my life and made it colorful. He isn't the whole book. But, thinking of his many promises to me, I don't think that this would happen, although there's a possibility. It isn't the heart which chooses whom we will love, but fate. Whatever happens, I'll just presume that everything is planned. No matter what, I know that I'll have a finished wonderful love story. I will certainly have a happy ending. :)

Oops! ...I Did It Again

I played with your heart
Got lost in the game
Oh baby baby
Oops! You think I'm in love
That I'm sent from above
I'm not that innocent.


Pure love and true love is hard to find nowadays. I reckon that we still have to use a time machine and go back to the past just to experience these. Where have chivalry and quixotic romance gone?

Modern teens love to flirt. Oops. Not just modern teens, but a large number of people in history too! More than half of the world's population are players and heartbreakers. Why can't they be satisfied in just one lover? I bet that those people are too confident about their overflowing charisma. If they just aren't concerned about their egos more than their hearts, they wouldn't be like this. They would be content in whatever God sent them to love. I guess they're just hungry for attention. They are not happy, and never will be happy for contentment is foreign to them.

Many times I've experienced being played. Does it hurt? No, it doesn't, after several months of deadly emotional pain. Then, I became curious. How does it feel having lots of boyfriends? I only knew how to love truly until then. I realized that it was a boring business, for my heart didn't leap and rush because of romantic ecstasy. I realized that commitment should be taken seriously by both parties, and only then you'll experience magic. A soft love song is what you'll hear and colorful fireworks will be above you. That is fictional, of course, but I was describing the intense feeling that true love may bring. You won't benefit from playing with others' hearts. You'll only get your bad karma that'll teach you a lesson the hard way.

Reasons Why I Want to Go Back to My Childhood


1. Children are carefree.

I sometimes get green with envy of these little lambs for they don't get stressed, and aren't being pressured. They aren't forced to learn something that they detest. They are free to wander happily, for they have no worries. High school gives me lots of problems and concerns, and that prevents me from being blithe. Instead of enjoying the precious life of mine given by God, they let me worry about nonsensical stuff.

2. Children are cuter.

I always hear folks say "How cute!" when they see a little babe or toddler. Of course they are cute! All mini versions of everything are cute. Some girls can't even help but scream when they see furry pups. They are adorable for they are usually plump, and have sparkles of innocence in their eyes. Children are also likely to get more attention from their parents, for their cuteness are their advantage.

3. Children are innocent.

I'd like to get my innocence back for I've committed less sins then. The more my eyes are exposed to sins, the more I am likely to commit them. Children are very lucky until the time comes when their innocence is taken away from them.

4. Children get in touch with nature more than adults do.

Children are supposed to always play outdoors. As a kid, I always play outside. I was happier back then, but I ain't really sure of the reason why. I reckon that it was because of nature. There is some sort of magic lurking in the flora and fauna that makes us happy. God really made nature for humans' happiness that can be explained well by children's laughter.

5. Children are meek.

Children are meek. Children are submissive. Children are harmless (except when they get naughty and bite everyone they meet with their little teeth). They really are, unless some kind of negative forces have influenced them. They're gullible and naive. That is just what Our Father wants us to be, but of course, we must not be so stupid like ignorant little pups.

6. Children indulge themselves to their hearts' content.

Children usually haven't got self-discipline and are stubborn enough to stop doing what they want to do. They eat when they're hungry, sleep when they're tired, play when they're bored, and sing and dance when they want to - not minding who the audiences are and not caring whether they look funny. I know that this behavior is only caused by immaturity, but isn't it nice to do things that we want with no one stopping us?

7. Children are honest.

It's a little tragic that they haven't got tact but it's also a blessing in disguise. We often have trouble finding out whether grown-ups tell the truth or not, but you can always count on a child's frankness.

8. Children are not afraid to show their feelings.

They laugh when they're happy, cry when sad, and throw fits of temper when they don't get their way. Grown-ups have this habit of controlling their emotions, and showing false emotions in front of someone they dislike. They think that crying is a sign of weakness, so they'd die first before letting anyone see their tears to prove that they're strong. Children, on the other hand, get okay right away after they express their negative feelings. Grown-ups who hold back their tears are usually having their sorrows haunting them afterwards, which isn't a good thing.

9. Children do nothing.

"What are you doing?" "Nothing." Just like Christopher Robin, they do nothing and are happy because of it, until the time comes when they have to be busy for school. That's one of the things that I miss about my childhood. I just wander about, and do whatever my heart tells me. They don't experience stress and being pressured yet, and they take their time just doing nothing.

10. Children are imaginative.
Unless you're a writing or art-skilled student, you can't have imagination as your best friend, with all that memorization of baloney stuff. Right now I just believe that it is important to retrieve our easy access to imagination when we were children because all of the rational nonsense that the world imposes on us has dulled our minds already.

My Favorite Reading Quotes


Reading, after a certain age, diverts the mind too much from its creative pursuits. Any man who reads too much and uses his brain too little falls into lazy habits of thinking. - Albert Einstein
One must be an inventor to read well. There is then creative reading as well as creative writing. - Ralph Waldo Emerson
The worst thing about new books is that they keep us from reading the old ones. - John Wooden
A man only learns in two ways, one by reading, and the other by association with smarter people.  - Will Rogers
The greatest part of a writer's time is spent in reading in order to write. A man will turn over half a library to make a book. - Samuel Johnson
The reading of all good books is like a conversation with the finest minds of past centuries. - Rene Descartes
Reading is equivalent to thinking with someone else's head instead of one's own. - Arthur Schopenhauer
Reading maketh a full man; conference a ready man; and writing an exact man. - Francis Bacon
No one ever committed suicide while reading a good book, but many have tried while trying to write one. - Robert Byrne

Thoughts of a Little Wench


I once asked myself if I still could trust those grown-ups
Who loudly say with conceit that they are always right
Who discard opinions of those little lambs and pups
And who reckon that they're walking in the path of light.

I wonder why those people kill themselves with studies
They stock brains with much knowledge and don't care if they burst
When I asked one 'bout Bible, he gazed queerly at his buddies
They haven't time for God's Word, I presume it is the worst.

I wonder why they ask me 'bout my untouched appearance
"Put on nice dresses and makeup for your face flaws to hide."
I asked them back what they'd say if God asked them for instance,
"My child, I made you beautiful; why aren't you satisfied?"

I wonder why those people do all that they can for money
I asked a man and he answered, "It makes the world go round!"
With all those riches I frankly asked him, "Are you really happy?"
His face showed hesitation; he walked away and made no sound.

I wonder why those people please themselves with fornication
They haphazardly told me, "Lust is love and love is lust;
A child like you won't understand, concentrate on education!"
I know that they're two different things; their hearts are full of rust.

I wonder why grown-ups value matters of consequence
I ponder 'bout those conducts as I sit here on this bench
They think I'm too young to understand and have common sense
They scorn me for my beliefs and call me "The Little Wench".

Save my best behavior for a little later 'cause I'm only seventeen:)

That's actually a line from a song I like to listen to, "Seventeen" by Mandy Moore. I can just kinda relate to it right now.



Hi, I'm a fifteen year old girl. Some lads say that I'm too young. I really am. But why do my parents say "How irresponsible you are! You are OLD enough yet you are still immature! Why can't you be like (insert a girl's name here)? I don't know what I should do to you!"?

Hello?! I'm not eighteen yet. Darn! I'm pretty sure that teens of my age are the same, and I might be even better than some. I mean, I'm not yet mature, but I DO act more properly than half of the world's population, I guess. I can say that because I get to socialize with kids of my age. Adults aren't usually right in determining a younger person's personality for many are great actors and pretenders - and most of the time, they only show their true colors to folks of or near their age.

Honestly, I don't like people who are too serious with their lives. They think about the future too much that they don't even want to enjoy the present. They live to fulfill others' expectations, which is kind of hard and a sorrowful path to walk on. They keep on playing safe, for they love their selves too much. They just keep on conforming to avoid any trouble, and aren't brave enough to stand up for what they believe in. Well? I don't even think that they have personal beliefs. They are COWARDS who are afraid to break the rules even if that rule is SO WRONG. Don't get mad if you know that it's you whom I described. Being too responsible and feeling like a grown-up isn't really wrong, but it's TOO MUCH. I know lots of people like this. And I know in myself that I'm certainly NOT one of them.

They're taking their youth for granted, when all old folks wish that they could be young again, even for a minute. I am now a teen, not yet an adult, and I miss my childhood so bad. Those childhood memories are still vivid in my mind and I'm glad that I have them. But what about the TOO SERIOUS people of my age? This isn't the time to get serious with our lives yet - or maybe we need not to be serious for the rest of our lives. When they grow old, they won't have any teenage memories to laugh at.

Well, I have just spoken my mind. I may be immature now but I'll surely outgrow this. For now, I'll enjoy every teenage moment without stressing myself.

A Poem to Papa

To the person I secretly care about.


I could still recall when I was just a child 
When I was still naive, gentle and mild
I used to be hungry for your full attention
My sister and I wanted to be showered with affections.

I remember you used to carry me on your back
And tickle me playfully just to make me laugh
Now it seems like good memories like these we do lack
Because seeing each other everyday is enough.

My sister resembles Ma, and I resemble you
They're attention whores, we deafen them with silence
Whenever I see pictures that contain only us two
I cry inside for old times, though looking back makes no sense.

Though I used to never show you my love
He knows how I care as He watches from above
Now I'll make my feelings known - not even known to some
I'll cherish our every moment, in case tomorrow never comes.

Won't stop 'til I get bloodshot eyes.


I always get addicted to stuff that I really like. And that applies to the romance department, too. I'm just...too...intense - or should I say passionate. Yes, passionate may be the right term. Addiction isn't wonderful, right? Now, I have a new addiction and that is reading novels. "Why, that's a good thing, my dear! It makes you smarter!" Oh yes. I know that. But this isn't good - I feel it, this isn't good. Like "shopaholicism", I know that this isn't good now. I've been neglecting my other duties because I am too engrossed in reading English novels.

Now I love literature as much as I love arts. I know that I ain't logically smart, so I go for these two. I tend to babble about the two novels that I've finished reading in two days to my mom. However, she only said that I should be studying my lessons instead. Uhm...you know that I hate to do that. It is useless, for nothing would ever be absorbed by my brain because I know that I would do it half-heartedly. Didn't they say that we should follow our hearts?

I wish I could be as awesome as those classical authors were...*sigh* Modern literature, specifically teen fiction, doesn't impress me much. So I think I'd rather start reading classic stories - classic children's literature. Something like Alice in Wonderland. Ugh, I really can't tell what I want by now. All novels are awesome, although they have boring parts that give me headaches. Now here's my problem: Once I start reading a book, I badly want to finish it as soon as possible. But sometimes when I get through the boring parts, I start to have the desire to read other novels and that would make it hard for me to finish one.

I just love literature. I won't stop reading 'til I get bloodshot eyes. I won't stop reading 'til I get blind.

Written by a Paranoid Girl


I called you ‘cause I missed you so bad
Thoughts of you really drive me mad
But when you spoke you’re the opposite of glad
I suddenly wondered, “What’s up with that lad?”

I wait for your text every minute
My heart is breaking bit by bit
It hurts that you don’t even think of me
My tears are falling, oh why can’t you see?

You were absolutely sweet from the start
Now it seems like you like tearing my heart apart
I used to daydream because of infatuation
But now I break mirrors because of confusion

I can’t help but wonder what happened to you
Could it be that you’ve already found someone new?
Maybe it’s wrong to think that you’re my soul mate
I always get heartbroken, maybe it’s my fate. 

The Perfect Man


You don't have to lower your standards for any guy - that's what they say. Well, they're right, because I finally found the perfect man for me. I currently have a boyfriend and he has all the qualities that I'm looking for a guy except for intelligence (according to him). He isn't an honor student like me, but he has enough wisdom and common sense so I'd consider him smart too. Actually, the right description for him is witty. He makes me laugh like crazy and I feel like I want to roll on the floor because of it. I'm just so in love. <3

He's so sensitive and sweet like a little kid to the point of being absolutely adorable. He tolerates my immaturity, enjoys my company, and showers me with lots of gifts and affection. He treats me like a princess and calls me her goddess. Our relationship never runs out of fun, excitement, surprises, romance, and sweetness. He was raised well and has very good manners. He really knows how to treat a girl right and I know deep in my heart that he takes me seriously. He's rare. I couldn't ask for more.

NOW I KNOW! I think I could already differentiate a playboy from a sincere guy. These things are just my opinion, but if you get even a little disrespect or mistreatment from a guy, you should back off, especially if he's still courting you. A player is a sweet talker, and he does tricks that sweep you off your feet. Be careful because he is experienced enough to have the ability to make you fall hard. He can be social and popular with the girls. A womanizer is rather easy to identify. If a guy really loves you, he'd be glad to spend every minute with you. However, you'd hear too many excuses from a player. He may be too busy flirting with every girl he meets. *wink*

The perfect guy for me is exactly the man of my dreams. Dream guys exist, because I've found one. They're very rare though. Real nice guys act like gentlemen, lengthen their patience, and love you as much as they can. I also think that introducing you to his family may be a sign that he's serious. Being picky isn't wrong, it's just protecting ourselves from heartbreak. Just be sure to act properly too so that you and "the perfect man" wouldn't seem to be mismatched. The quality of a guy shouldn't be based from physical attractiveness or charisma - we should look at their hearts. That's why they say that love is blind. Choose wisely, ladies. He's just around the corner. :D

Desperate


Oh Venus, I'm completely unsatisfied
Without him I swear I would have died
He causes my heart to terribly ache
Bestow me your beauty, for heaven's sake!

I feel much envy, his heart's occupied
Oh beautiful Venus, please be on my side
Hell has no fury like a woman scorned
But I'd rather grieve than have their faces torn

I'm really desperate, oh Venus and Cupid!
Passionate love made me look stupid
Venus please bless me with overflowing charms
And Cupid please strike him so he'll fall in my arms

Grant my wish and I'd give everything
In my heart he'll be my only one king
I'll love him with a love that's more than love
For he's the only one I desire to have.

The Beauty of Sadness


Beauty is in every thing - even in sadness. Yes, I know that it's a negative word, and you may wonder what the heck went on inside my skull. I actually got this idea from Backstreet Boys's "Shape of My Heart", and there is a line that goes like this: "Sadness is beautiful, loneliness is tragical." After a few hours of pondering, I was convinced that sadness is really beautiful.

Whenever I feel sad, I listen to sad but beautiful musical pieces that never fail to make me sadder. The sadness that I feel becomes more intense, until I just burst into tears. Crying actually feels good. I like pouring out all the negative feelings that my heart feels until my eyes cannot produce tears anymore. When I'm sad, it's either I listen to sad melodies or I isolate myself and take some time to reflect. What's beautiful is the combination of silence and the way you feel. I find inner peace. Except for the good old memories, the moments where I get very sentimental are the most beautiful. I've got to separate myself from the physical world and get in touch with my own soul.

We have to accept sadness because it's a part of life. Without it, we cannot appreciate joy. Sadness inspires the artists to produce art from the terrible feelings that they feel. Maybe the fact that sadness accompanied by maudlin music separates me from the real world is what's beautiful. It is good to visit daydreamland once in a while. It's my way of escaping stress and pressures from the real world.

Sadness and depression are different. Try listening to Schubert Serenade to understand what I'm saying. Try having contact with nature too. Whenever you feel sad, remember that it's just temporary and don't hate yourself. We can't do anything about our emotions. Whatever challenges you face in your life, don't forget to pray because eventually, your frowns will turn into lovely smiles.

Philline


Once there was a girl named Philline
Who sat alone on a bench singin'
A slow love song that reminded her 
Of the romantic past with her handsome lover.

While she was sitting alone, reminiscing
A couple walked past her, sweetly kissing
To her surprise it was her ex-boyfriend
Having a sweet moment with his new girlfriend.

The sight of them really broke her heart,
She tried to forget but it's hard on her part,
She held back her tears but she couldn't help it
Poor Philline silently cries on her seat.

But the boy heard a familiar voice crying,
He looked behind and saw Philline weeping,
After two months passed their eyes finally met,
As she was wiping her cheeks so wet.

"Hey J*** what are you doing here?"
"Nothing, I'm just walking with my dear."
"Is that so? Good, have a happy day."
"Thank you, we're leaving - there's nothing to say."

Philline was left alone once again.
"This time I won't be hurt again by men,
I've learned my lesson, all guys are the same
I won't be like before who's easy to tame."

And once again this girl named Philline
Sat alone on a bench singin'
A slow love song that reminded her 
Of the romantic past with her handsome lover.

Night


However dark, I love the night
Than daytime where there's too much light
I've sorrowful fate that's in my hands
That only the black sky understands.

At least at night there ain't too much noise
Less honking vehicles and irritating voices
And with the soothing nighttime breeze 
I find my heart and soul at peace.

When I'm faced with sorrow that tears up my soul
At least I have something to share my dark fate with
Wounds in my heart, as deep as a black hole
It seems like I'll have them for as long as I breathe.

No one understands me but the moon
Born at night, lonely and alone
So I'd like to feel true happiness soon
'Cause grief and anger turned my heart into stone.

True Love Waits - And Yes, It Exists


I believe in soul mates. I believe in forever. I believe in true love. I believe in destiny. Realistic people may disagree with me, but I don't really care. I won't lose hope because I'm still young. The right man will come when I am matured enough - when I'm emotionally, physically, mentally, and spiritually ready. Someday, my missing half will come to complete me. Yes, someday. That someday will surely come except if I die right away.

When Adam felt alone, God gave him a companion who is a woman named Eve. They complemented each other perfectly. They loved with a love that was more than love, remained faithful to each other, and stayed together until death parted them. If some people claim to have found their soul mates and are now happily married, I'm sure that I will too - someday. God has known me even before I was conceived; so when it comes to matters like this, he knows best. He knows who is best suited for me and he is yet to come someday because this is not yet the right time. Now all that I have to do is to prepare and wait patiently for the second coming of Jesus and for the coming of my other half in my life.

As early as now, I am already imagining what my soul mate and I will feel when we meet each other. There will surely be a strong unexplainable attraction. The feelings that we will have for each other would be pure love. We will never get bored with each other. We will always get butterflies whenever we're together, and will be perfectly happy even if we just sit together in silence. I believe that he will make me experience love at first sight. The attraction between us would be so intense that it would be impossible to separate us. We will instantly know that we are born for each other. We'll understand each other even if we say nothing at all. That's how I comprehend true love. I know that such thing exists, I just have to believe.

"Take delight in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart." - Psalm 37:4

Honestly speaking, I don't really care about earthly things. As Helen Keller quoted, "The best and most beautiful things cannot be seen or ever touched - they must be felt with the heart." As a girl, I want to be protected, cherished, and feel love from a man. I strongly yearn for true love and the true happiness and peace that it brings to our soul. I don't really care about how high my grades are or the things that I have achieved or the beautiful things that I own. Vanity, pride, and power are trivial things that prevents us from the things that bring us true happiness. It is love that I long for, and the right man for me. For God knows that this is what my heart desires, I know that it will be given to me. someday.

As hard as it may seem for me, I will try to wait because I know that that man, whoever he is, is really worth the wait. I'm sure that Mr. Right would feel great when I tell him that I've tried to avoid flirting with other guys while I've waited faithfully for him. All the passionate love that burns inside me will remain in my heart even if I cannot hold it in anymore because I want to give it to the most special person who is yet to come in my life. He better watch out when I pour out all my affections to him because he'll surely be bloated. He'll never hunger for love, and he won't need to seek attention from other women. You better prepare too for my arrival into your life, my future spouse. :)

Never Get Tired of Loving.


Several people may hurt me, and they may be the ones whom I love/loved the most, but they won't make me bitter. Surely, I'd be angry and pathetic for a time but it'll pass, and I will have the need of giving love again. I had my first crush when I was three (I think it was Leonardo DiCaprio), and I've loved the idea of love since then. I guess I was born in this world to give love and long for it.


"There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made in perfect love."
1 John 4:18

When I talk about love, it can be about all kinds of love. But...as usual, this is about romantic love. Even though I was a bit traumatized by some bad relationship experiences, I am not afraid to love again. It'll be unfair to my soul mate (or twin flame, if I really happen to have one) or to my future husband. I will love as if I am not afraid of getting hurt. I will love as if this is my last day on earth. I will love very passionately, because my soul is full of love. 

My heart may be destroyed in any way possible: crush it, throw it, stab it, or pound it - but eventually it will grow back to being whole again. I have said "I'll love you forever" to some former beaus and I guess I really mean it. We may have stopped communicating with each other now, but there is still love left for them - I know it when I see them. If they just say sorry and attempt to befriend me, I'll surely treat them well as a friend, and I'll do good things for them because I loved them, they once made me happy, and they have been written in my diary. 

My heart is currently on fire. It burns with so much love. I can feel it. It needs someone to be showered affections upon. You may say that I should be paying attention to my studies and not to crappy stuff like this. You are right, but I can't take this away from me. This is my nature, this is how God designed me.

"And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love."
1 Corinthians 13:13

When I'm finally married to my future husband, I'll make sure that he will have no regrets. He will receive the greatest portion of love that I could ever give. I will be the most loving wife and mother, expressing my love for my future family in any way possible. And even though I am just this young, I am already envisioning my married life, and it will never be as miserable as others'. I will keep the peace and harmony at all costs. I will really make the man destined for me think that he is very lucky to have me. 

Sisterly Love

My sister and I had thousands of fights since I was a toddler and she was a baby. While I was eating sweets that my mother gave me, I was annoyed by her loud cries so I kicked her. How ruthless I was! I thought it would stop her from making noises, but it didn't. It was the start of our sibling rivalry.

I have always envied her when we were little girls. Mommy always carried her while I always had to walk. Our relatives adored her more than me, maybe because she's cuter. And perhaps that is why I am so touchy about it until now. She never fails to annoy the crap out of me. I remember hitting her head, punching her, biting her arms and back. I was a good girl at school, but not at home, because of her. Several times I wished that I was the only child, or the younger child, or that she wasn't born because she gets all the attention. But there is one advantage of being the older sister - she gets my old stuff while they buy me new ones!

As schoolchildren, our relationship with each other never changed, even though we fought less. It annoyed me whenever she asked for help for her school works. Ugh. We weren't close, she had her own life and I had my own life too. I thought that it was better that way because you could only expect war when we are together.

Now that we are both teenagers, and she's taller than me now, I don't feel like I'm the older sister. I never acted like one anyway, I'm just the more aggressive one. Some people mistake her as the older one, but I'm never offended by that. It actually is a compliment that I look younger than my age, haha. But honestly, I feel like we' are already growing apart. I realized that I didn't like it that way. I missed her. We're actually kind of close back when we were preschoolers.

I don't have any other sibling. I only have her. That is why when we were little girls, she was my only playmate. I played, danced, and sang with her. I was always the leader, and she just followed. We had really happy times together back when our imaginations run really wild. Those moments where told to me by the old photo album that we have.

We still fight until now, but it rarely happens. Now I love her as a best friend, although I have two other best friends, and I'll cherish every moment I have with her. Ate loves you, Camille. :) I am not actually sure if you will ever see this blog post.


If you don't understand how a woman could both love her sister dearly and want to wring her neck at the same time, then you were probably an only child. 
- Linda Sunshine 


Having a sister is like having a best friend you can't get rid of. You know whatever you do, they'll still be there.- Amy Li


Sisterly love is, of all sentiments, the most abstract. Nature does not grant it any functions. - Ugo Betti


It's hard to be responsible, adult and sensible all the time. How good it is to have a sister whose heart is as young as your own. - Pam Brown


My Admirer


Before I thought he liked me too
And it's because of a friend that's why I knew
Too much happiness it made me feel
Overjoyed that I can be ill.

And whenever he is there I blush
My heartbeats suddenly begin to rush
At first I did nothing but deny
Just to hide my feelings I did lie.

My love goes deeper as time goes by
As I get to know this pretty guy
To him I can't take off my eye
I was really in love with him, oh my!

Nothing remains a secret as they say
So my secret just spread in the class one day
He felt awkward as I can see
But it's not a reason to avoid me.

He really ignores me, I wonder why
Maybe it's just that he's being shy
And he just can't find any words to say
But we are not close, so I guess it's okay.

One day I was warned by a very close friend
He said that my feelings for him now should end
The rumor that he likes me is a very big lie
That's why he can't even say a simple hi.

So I told my classmates to please stop the tease
Then I asked who his true crush is
Through a text message a close friend did send
As I read I was shocked, it was my dear best friend!

After a long time my heart is broken again
Because of what I've just found out then
I just hope this won't ruin our friendship
Though my heart was shattered and wounded very deep.

Meanest Guy


I kept wondering what mistakes I made
Why did your feelings suddenly fade
I thought all the love left can still be revived
But no, it didn't, how can I survive

You don't care if I say I'm sorry
What benefits do you get with your pride?
Is it easy for you to trash our love story
Is is stupid to believe that I'll be your bride?

Just days after I set you free
You immediately found someone who'd replace me
Don't you have any respect left in you?
Though I'm so jealous there's nothing I can do

Someday you'd surely realize
How much of a jerk you've been
One day tears will flood from your eyes
'Cause you're the meanest guy I've ever seen.

Ex-Crush


'Til now I don't understand what I feel 
'Cause I'm still stunned the moment you stare 
If it's just infatuation and not for real
Throughout these times why do I still care?

It's not new to me that you avoid still
For you knew how much you have sinned
It took a long time for my wounds to heal
But my feelings just can't be blown away by the wind

When you look why do I still feel weak,
When you talk why do I get blushes on cheeks?
And whenever you smile, I can't help but smile too
Though there's someone in my heart, there's still room for you

I don't want to get my old feelings back
I promise I won't 'til chickens learn to quack
But it seems you have made me love you again
Now I guess I'm again ready to be heartbroken

My ex-crush, can't you just leave me alone?
You'd only hurt me deeply to my bones
Please don't make me feel like you like me too
A smile means a lot, be careful of what you do. 

One


You're telling me that you love me
But I don't know if I'd believe
You love two girls and that shouldn't be
But you won't really let me leave

How come that you still can't let go
She's now a part of history
It hurts 'cause I do love you so
Forget her for she set you free

Now tell me what's this all about
I'm starting to have many doubts
Could it be that you're just using me
To bring back what you lost to thee?

Now that she wants you back for good
You're asking me now what you should
Go for her if she makes you glad
'Cause loving two girls at once is bad.

All this time I had been true
And I meant those three words I love you
I never wanted to be the second "hon"
So now you should only choose one.

No One Said


No one asked me to try this relationship
No one said I should love you way too deep
I thought I shouldn't mind what others say
But I realized they're right when you pushed me away.

Yes I know I'm more than stupid
But has someone said you are worse than a bastard?
I'm feeling great pain, thanks to Cupid
Why are you making things so hard?

No one said I that I should believe you
No one said I should meet someone new
If only I knew that to me this would happen
I would have broke your heart first then.

I'm trying so hard so you'd get off my mind
There's nothing to hate, with your love I am blind
I mean it when I said I'll love you forever
I still love you but now I want you never.

Dear Crush


I know you know that I like you
And I'm hoping that you're like that too.
But because I can't control your feelings
If you like my best friend  I can do nothing.
You're my first thought when I wake up
My fancy when I dream or nap.
The reason why I go to school,
A sight of you makes me delightful.
In my wallet I have your pictures
That I always look at even during lectures
When I am bored I scribble your name
And I've been inspired ever since you came.
I look at every act you do
And I can't take my eyes off you
I blush when you stare or talk to me
I'm so crazy for you, can't you see?
I don't care if you don't feel the same
But my heart always screams your name
I've always wanted to get your attention
And I don't care if it's just infatuation
Now that I've already made my confession
About my true feelings and emotion
I want you to know that you are my first love
The most important thing that I could ever have.




I composed this when I was 13, and I was crazy about a classmate.:)
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