Ringing Bells and Singing in A Classroom (Dream)

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Me: I dreamed that I was in a classroom-like area, and I was performing the song “Open Arms” using a Balinese bell. It was in the right tune (although bells don’t have a range of tones in real life) and people were paying attention. But when it came towards the end of the song, I became bored with the bell so I just sang the last chorus with my voice and felt it. I sounded so good but it was the kind of low voice I have in real life! :) It was so fun, my high school teacher also came to the scene. What does this mean?

L: Hi. It can mean that you should use your creativity in all things you do like music, writing, teaching, etc. 

An Ancient Egyptian Message from Spirit

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Last night, I had a dream of being in some place with some people that I don’t know in real life but we were just interacting with each other as if we always used to do it. Someone was writing (or typing) something, and I told him/her, “That’s wrong, it should be ‘Maat.’” Maat is actually an Egyptian goddess of justice and truth. Then, in my dream, we were divided into groups. There would be a some sort of a costume contest representing the different kingdoms of the world. It was not explicitly stated in my dream, but it seemed like our group represented the ancient Egyptians. I was one of the two models who represented our group. I had a light brown garment, almost like the color of the desert. I then proceeded to put makeup on my face. I put a very pigmented silver eyeshadow on my eyes, and I saw in the mirror that I already had an eyeliner. I also put silver shimmery stuff on my cheekbones and a little dab of pink lipstick on my lips. I really looked beautiful and exotic. We then started to strut while holding very long flags with gibberish written on them. It also wasn’t explicitly stated in the dream but I felt like our team won because I was feeling ecstatic.

When I woke up, I pondered so hard about the meaning of my dream. And while I have consulted dream dictionaries online, I felt like the meaning of my dream was different. The goddess Maat may have a message for me, I might have a past life in Egypt, or I may be called to reconnect with ancient Egyptian wisdom that may help me in my present life. I swear I haven’t been thinking about Egypt or Maat last night or these past days. They just came to my dream out of nowhere.

I then meditated for 40 minutes (I am a total beginner when it comes to this), heard and saw many of my different thoughts. I also saw colors like indigo and green. Green appeared more frequently. It was interesting because when I searched online about it, I found out that seeing colors in meditation is actually good. Whatever chakra that specific color corresponds to, it means that that chakra is healing or rejuvenating. In my case, it was my third eye chakra and heart chakra. Seeing a lot of green made perfect sense since I have recently been dealing with emotional pain regarding my job. The issues were petty, but when you deal with challenging people everyday, sometimes the pain just gets to you. I’m glad my heart has somehow healed.

Anyway, during the last twenty minutes of my meditation, I asked what message my dream had for me and if I was indeed an ancient Egyptian in my past life, I asked that Egyptian me to come forth and say what message I needed to hear. I saw the Egyptian me but it was not very clear. I felt like I was quite content with the life I led in ancient Egypt and I saw a vision of like a soul overseeing the Earth from above, looking at her (my) life in ancient Egypt and in her present life in the Philippines. I saw myself in the Philippines having my own family, taking care of them, and being happy and living a quiet life. She told me that what I just needed to hear was that I am loved. “You are loved. You are so loved.” She told me that over and over that I literally started to feel love envelope me and and my tears fell while I saw myself being low key and surrounded by my kids and husband who love me. I am currently a single woman, still twenty-three years old, so what I saw might be taking place in the near future. What I expected to hear was something like information about the advanced technologies or magical stuff used in ancient Egypt, but the message for me was just a simple truth, something soothing that my soul really needed to know right now. It was touching. I had zero doubts that that vision was really from the spiritual realm.

Meanwhile, I just ordered the Isis Oracle by Alana Fairchild. I felt like I needed that spiritual kind of deck with an Egyptian theme since I have just connected with my Egyptian past. I have also added ancient Egypt to my list of research and books to buy. I was just amazed with how dreams send us messages and how meditation can connect us to the spiritual realm and literally give us visions and messages. I guess I will be meditating daily from now on to enhance my intuition, and I will be painting on a canvas with a message saying, “You are so loved,” and hang it in my room to remind me of that truth and of my brief connection with my Egyptian self. 

The Role of Kids and Youthfulness In My Career Path (Gemini Midheaven)

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Just recently, I had an epiphany about the next job that I would take should I make a career shift in the far future. While I was thinking of it, it made me understand better my Midheaven in the sign of Gemini. People with Gemini Midheaven might feel a little bit confused about their career paths and be a little bit wishy-washy about it, but that is because they are jacks-of-all-trades and they are meant to appear that way to the public. The first job that I had was a news writer for the local government, my present job is a banker (it is stable so I would have to have very strong reasons to change my career), and should I resign in the future when I become pregnant and decide to be a hands-on mother for my future children, I might apply as a kindergarten teacher when my kids are old enough to do things for themselves. This sudden surge of enlightenment in my head came with several reasons which I will state in the next paragraphs.

I like kids because of their innocence, pureness, and creativity, but I am not the type who shrieks in the presence of children and smothers them with hugs and kisses. I am actually the gentle type who just sits around and waits for them to approach me. And despite my seemingly snobbish approach to kids, for some weird reason, small children are drawn to me. They just do. People say it’s because I have a pretty face, but I don’t think that is the case. Children must be feeling that I am somewhat on their level, that I have a playful side, or maybe I project a nurturing vibe to them. I am not quite sure myself. But children always seem to laugh or smile like crazy when they see me. And they like just being near me even when we are not talking sometimes. I also have this childlike appearance to the public because of my youthful looks and outlook in life which makes people around me want to take care of me or teach me something even when I am not asking for it. My paintings even appeal to small children or people who are young at heart even though I did not specifically target children as an audience for my art. Perhaps I am meant to connect to younger people after all.

I also think that it has something to do with my childhood. I was loved as a child - I was clothed, bathed, and fed, but I felt like I didn’t quite fit in in the family. There were a lot of heartaches, and physical and emotional abuse done to me (because let’s be honest, there are no “perfect” parents) in addition to the bullying that I have suffered during my kindergarten years. I was a wounded child but I kind of covered it up and never dealt with it because I was still a child. Then those issues resurfaced later in my teenage years like angry pimples that won’t leave your face until they are popped. I have now healed from those childhood wounds after several years of consulting spirituality for healing and those painful experiences I had now make me want to understand and help other children establish good foundations in themselves while they are still young.

After the age of eight, I felt like I was forced to grow immediately by my environment and so when I became an adult, I tried hard to find my inner child again who may know the answers to my happiness. So many people have also lost their inner children because of the pressure of society; and that is why I want my own future children, and the other children that I will be teaching in the future, to stay connected to their innocence and creativity no matter how cruel life may be for them. Nowadays, I am also looking for ways to creatively do everything and I am now also consulting my inner child for some life decisions that I have to make. I have always loved watching kids’ reality TV shows, but now I also buy books regarding pregnancy, raising children, children’s books, and arts and crafts that children may do to enhance their creativity and imagination.

I have always thought that I may be employed in the bank for life but then I may change careers after five years or so, or I may find ways to do both things at once. I feel like I will be helping humanity a lot more by becoming a kids’ teacher and I believe I will be very good at it. Sometimes, it takes a lot of twists and turns before we finally find the right path for us. In my case, I have finally found it - I just have to find a good timing before I finally transition. From now on, I will always be educating myself on how to deal with kids, their psychology, and on being an earth angel for these newly-born souls. 

Dream about A Bigger Moon

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Me: Last night in my dream I remember seeing the full moon outside and I realized that it was so big and near like a supermoon. Then I went inside the house with my family and saw the full moon again when I looked up the ceiling. It was so big that I was amazed and scared at the same time. Then I made my mother come along with me outside to take a better look at the moon because it was so big. Outside, we saw the moon bigger; it was scary because we could almost hold it. I could reach it if I jumped. Then I remembered that it has already been a week since the full moon, that my dream was unrealistic. When I said that in my dream, suddenly the moon looked less full, and it looked like someone took bites of the side of the moon like a cookie. What do you think this means?

L: The full moon represents dreams and messages from dreams. Bits missing is not remembering the whole dream. Write it on paper as you can in the middle of the night. 

Why I Haven't Written in A While

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I took a hiatus from sharing my thoughts to the world from the early 2018 when I started working. Back then, I was a writer or a journalist for the provincial government and now I have a stable job in the biggest bank in the Philippines. I have never ever in my entire life imagined myself as a banker as I am known as a writer who sometimes sings, but hey, some people also find their lifetime careers unexpectedly and I guess I am one of them. Work just takes up a lot of my time and energy that I have forgotten some things in life like writing, painting, and hanging out with my friends. When I worked as a journalist, I had very little training in it because Mass Communication was not something that I took up in college. And I also have no knowledge when it comes to banking but I got hired maybe because I look pleasant enough to the customers. I had no time to even just have a good time because I had to teach myself the work that I had to do. It was so hard. But then, no job is easy as they say. Some jobs just look easy for outsiders but there will always be high mountains to climb when it comes to our careers. We all have to make sacrifices just to put rice on the table.

A lot of people noticed that I have become inactive from social media for more than a year now. I guess it’s because I realize that there is more to life than just making yourself look good in a social media platform. I am also undergoing a phase of just focusing on myself and social media holds me back from doing that. In social media, there is a lot of comparison and one-upping going on and I have decided that I don’t want to be a part of that. I believe that the only way that I can thrive in this world is when I focus on myself, spend less time lounging and scrolling through social media, and do what I want to do without anyone’s approval. Taking a break from following trends or gaining other people’s approval is what I have wanted for myself all this time. And I think I have grown to be a better woman because of that.

Regarding taking a break from social media, this is what I have realized: looking from the outside, somebody else will always be prettier than you, richer, happier, or more popular. But then we don’t know about other people’s struggles because it’s not very seemly to air your dirty laundry for the world to see. A lot of what we see on the internet are illusions. I have decided to live in the real world instead of losing myself in the make-believe world of social media. I have learned a lot more once I have gone into society, talking to all kinds of people because of my jobs, and taking risks in doing things outside of my comfort zone. I was so selfish back then, all I wanted was to make myself look good and gain the society’s approval (you know, a classic Libran trait *wink*) that I realized that there is more to life than just having a thousand likes on a picture in Facebook. I have found myself one with humanity by being invisible and ordinary. And just a little disclaimer, I am not bashing social media lovers - I am just saying that it is not for me right now in this phase of my life. Eventually I will come back to it again but not right now.

Now that I am very content and I am kind of mastering my work in the bank, I am feeling ready to write and blog and paint again, like I used to do before. There were a lot of life experiences that I have missed writing about and I feel bad about that. Writing is best done when a certain kind of experience is still fresh in our minds, and we still have some lingering emotions about it. I just feel this sudden feeling of empowerment to express myself more through my art and writings because it’s part of who I am and I don’t ever want to lose that. I went through a year of just taking in everything - like just watching spiritual and witchy videos that educate me, and just reading a lot - and now I want to externalize my inner world again through my creations. I am looking forward to more writings and visual arts that I can show to my future children and I can look back on when I am already a granny. Ciao!

A Letter to Job

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Dear Job,

I am writing this letter to you in my blog because I am not shameless enough to send it to you as you are now a husband and a father to a four-year-old boy. I actually have a lot to say to you, even though already seven years has passed since we last had a conversation. If ever you stumble upon this letter in the future, I just want you to know that I have already forgiven you for hurting my feelings, although it took me a long time to be able to do that. We were seventeen and foolish at the time and we actually fell in love with the mental image that we had of each other. You probably thought I was a bombshell who turned people’s heads, while I thought of you as someone as dashing as Ronan Keating. In reality, we were just two down-two-earth, average teenagers who wanted attractive partners for themselves. Our disillusionment and other people’s involvement in our personal affair ended what we had back then, and you know that I have mourned for that even though I was already dating other guys after you.

I did not date one guy after another to make you jealous as I was aware that you wouldn’t. I did it to forget you, and to put a band-aid on the wound that you left on me. I wasn’t able to fall in love deeply again after we ended things between us. Perhaps in my own mind I was thinking that I was in love, but my heart just couldn’t connect with those guys at all. I am not even sure if what I felt for you was love, but what I am sure of is that what I felt for you was real and deep. What I am about to say next is not an ego boost for you but back then, you had this great power over me that everything you did to me, good or bad, made me crazy. It’s like you were my dream come true - that you were the kind of boyfriend I have always imagined to be with as a child. But then we realized that we were really not meant to be together because it seemed as if the universe conspired to turn everything against us. You will know what I am talking about once you see this.

If I was given the chance to undo my past with you, I wouldn’t undo it. We were probably meant to learn lessons from each other that way. Perhaps we had a soul contract with each other to meet in our teenage years and have the kind of experience that we had. I hope you are very happy right now with your own family. And I am genuinely happy for you (although back then I wasn’t) since I know that in the future, I will also have my own family with the love of my life and will be very happy and content. I know that my soul will always love you, although not romantically anymore. We are not each other’s soul mates. And someday, when I am already with someone who will be my future spouse, I know that my soul will thank you for pushing me away back then when I was obsessed with you. I wouldn’t have met him if you (and the other guys I loved after you) didn’t walk away from me. Now I can serenely type this letter for you as time has already healed me. I have already forgiven you and I sincerely wish you all the best in all your endeavors.

Your ex-lover,

Thea

Divorcing My Husband (Dream)


Me: Hi, I dreamed last night that I had a husband. He was rich but kind of controlling over me. Also, something tells me that he was cheating on me. I then saw him in bed with another woman. I recorded a video of his cheating but he got mad when he caught me taking a video. But I hugged and kissed him gently, then whispered to his ear, “Let’s get a divorce.” I forgot if he agreed or not. Then I decided to leave him and our son with him. I requested [to the universe] another baby with no parents and tried to start a new life without them. What do you think that means? It’s really weird.

L: It can mean getting involved with a man who turns out to be negative for you in life. It can mean take your time to get to know someone and don’t rush into marriage. 

Being Pregnant by A Mystery Guy (Dream)

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Me: Hi L:) Last night I dreamed of having a guy companion and it looks like a boyfriend. We were doing stuff together, having adventures and stuff. And then, he looked right at me while smiling and said that his baby was already growing for two weeks in my womb. The dream felt so real that I panicked because I wasn’t ready and I don’t want to have an abortion. I then woke up from my dream and realized that it wasn’t real because I am menstruating right now. What do you think that means?

L: Hi
It means you want to be in love and have you own family. Which will happen one day for sure. L

Dream about Pyrite Stones

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Me: Hi L, I had a weird dream last night but I forgot the storyline. What I rememer is that there were lots of big pyrite stones, both big and small, fashioned like crystal balls. I was amazed and I found them beautiful. What do you think that means?

L: Hi, it means your soul wants you to wear it or have it placed by your bed. I can bring you good energy. Read up on it.

Me: I actually have heard some bad stuff about pyrite being a “fool’s gold” and therefore not helping in achieving abundance so I planned on getting rid of my chunk of pyrite. Shortly after, I had that dream. I am glad that I was warned not to get rid of it. Now I’mm planning to buy pyrite jewelry to wear to work <3 Thanks a lot L

L: Yes, keep it. It's positive for sure.

Dream about Chakras

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Me: Hi L:) Last night I was researching into chakras that I have dreamed about them. I dreamed that people were handing me papers and I was printing on them colors which corresponds to their active chakras while I just intuitively knew which of their chakras are imbalanced and I avoided printing those imbalanced chakra colors. Does that mean something or did just my online research seep into my dream? What do you think?

L: Hi, it means you have healing ability. And maybe you can see people’s aura. It’s a positive dream for sure.

Me: How do you think I can use my healing ability Lawrence?

L: Try it on sick people :p
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